Jenn's Open Letter

We are writing open letters, and Jenn's letter is in the voice of your feet to women who wear high heels all the time!

June 14, 2016
Jenn's Feet

Jenn Hobby

We are writing open letters, and now it's Jenn's turn. Her open letter is a little different. She is writing in the voice of your FEET! So the feet are talking to you begging you to stop wearing high heels ALL THE TIME! That is one of Jenn's biggest pet peeves, and she feels she has to speak out. So, here is her letter in its entirety.

This is An Open Letter to Women Who Wear High Heels Everywhere… From Your Feet

Dear owner, hi, it’s your feet here. We’ve got an issue we need to address. NOW. 

It’s the fact that you put 5 inch heels on us EVERYWHERE you go. We feel we are the sacrificial lamb to your need to be taller. We fall on the sword of fashion every day for you. We actually don’t even mind it for special occasions - weddings, club nights, charity events, even date night, OK. We get that. But here’s where we, your feet, feel we are getting SCREWED. 

The Airport. Let’s talk long TSA lines, Terminal E, Trains, Escalators and long slow lines for boarding… All in HEELS. Why? Why must you torture us so? The bruising! The aching!!! 

Next, Sporting events. Falcons. Braves. Hawks. Do you know how many stairs there are to navigate?? Stairs to climb. And STARES from other women to endure. It’s just embarrassing. You should know what all the other feet know. We look like we are trying too hard. We LOOK DESPERATE! And, we do not want to wobble to the tailgate. 

And here’s to you, superMom, we are your feet. We helped you carry that child, so why why why torture us while taking your baby into day care while carrying that super heavy bucket seat. Can’t you spare us at least until you get to the office? And don’t even get us started about the playground at the park. You do not win fashion points WITH TODDLERS. Do you see this SWELLING? They don’t care and you’re killing us! 

We’ve endured the bunions, our toes cramping, our arches wrecked for LONG ENOUGH. Those peep toe 5 inch ones are for sure causing us these burning ingrown toenails. Don’t EVEN make me bring this up to our neighbors, your ANKLES. 

We are incredibly jealous of all the OTHER feet in sandals this summer. Look how happy they are in flats! Look how wiggly their toes can be! Look at how lovely those greek wrap arounds are - ahh that’s heaven! Sling-backs, T-strap, Slip on, Mule, WHATEVER! They get to walk on fluffy clouds while are cramped to hell. 

Spare us the ice and ibuprofen! How about we compromise this summer with a wedge???